I use less than half of my monthly mobile phone call allowance because I’m a surly old git who doesn’t ring people, so I was surprised to see an extra £4.11 for ‘calls’ slapped on to the bill.

I queried it.

After I got through to a human voice (7″ 56′) I was told the charge was for calls to 0800 numbers.

“But 0800 numbers are free!” I protested.

“Not from a mobile”, she answered.

“Where can I find these charges on your web site?” I asked.

“Oh, you can’t, because we don’t publish them. I can’t tell you what they are because the companies who have these numbers set the prices they charge themselves.”

“Well … but I rang 0800 numbers, which are free, and I’ve still been charged.”

“Oh yes, there’s a service charge on all 0800 numbers.”

“Hang on, you mean everytime I call a number beginning with 08- from my mobile, O2 will put an extra charge on top?”

“That is correct, yes sir.”

“Well can you tell me the O2 portion of the charges I incur when dialling these numbers from an O2 phone?”

“Certainly sir.”

And this is what she told me:

0800 (free) numbers: 19.57 pence per minute
0844 numbers: 19.57 pence per minute
0845 numbers: 19.57 pence per minute
0870 numbers: 19.57 pence per minute
0871 numbers: 34.26 pence per minute
09- numbers (usually sex lines): don’t even begin to ask

This information is nowhere to be found on the O2 website. It’s a covert operation.

No wonder we’re led through a maze of number punching and voicemail options before we are allowed to ask a question. I reckon on an average of 5 minutes after I first dial goes by before I am permitted to speak to a customer advisor. That’s a quid a call, just to O2, on top of the cost charged by the company I’m calling. More, in many cases.

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