Many years ago, aware that I had incredible difficulty remembering and associating names and faces, I coined the term ‘Nominal Dysphasia’ jokingly to excuse my predicament.

In 1994 a medical journal published an article on ‘Nominal Asphasia’. Exactly the same problem I had, but a slightly different name to the one I had made up for a laugh.

It turns out to be a real and general problem, not just me being thick or lazy. And at every conference and exhibition it’s always the same — people I have never seen before come up and greet me warmly, and until I see their badge or they give me a card, I have no idea who they are. Oddly enough it doesn’t happen with everyone. I saw an old friend at the London Book Fair last week whom I hadn’t seen since 1979, and I recognised him and remembered his name instantly.

Now here is a peculiar example which happened at fotoFringe, the picture buyers’ fair, yesterday. An attractive woman came up to the table and I greeted her warmly, “Hello! How are you?” (my all-purpose welcome and get-out). I had never seen her before in my life. We were offering blocks of Lindt chocolate in exchange for business cards, and as she didn’t have a card with her (why do so many people come to business trade fairs without cards nowadays? It makes no sense) she wrote down her name.

And as I glanced at her handwriting I immediately knew who she was. She worked for an educational publisher in the south Midlands, and I had met her at last year’s fotoFringe, and we’d had a good long chat. She was really nice.

I didn’t remember her at first sight, but I remembered her handwriting instantly. Is that odd? Or is that very odd? I could recognise and remember handwriting I’d seen for a brief moment twelve months ago, but not a face, a person or a name. It may explain my passion for typefaces and fonts, but it’s rather a lame excuse when you’re shaking the hand of your best man, frantically trying to recall where you’ve seen him before.

So apologies to all my friends, relations, colleagues et al when I sweep past you and cut you dead. It’s not intentional at all. It’s just me. I’m an extremely pleasant, warm and welcoming person, and if you write your name on a little piece of paper I will remember you straight away.

Promise!

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