I don’t want to bang on about health, but this I found quite amusing.

As a youth, one of the first Acts I planned on my elevation to the throne was to ban everyone over the age of 40 from discussing their health except with health professionals. I stick to that ukase faithfully; now all my friends are health professionals.

For the past two weeks I’ve been enduring bouts of giddiness. Standing up quickly, I nearly fall over. Rolling over in bed, I get violent pillow spin (no, it’s NOT the drink). I have to wait a few moments before getting up. At the Budapest exhibition at the RA yesterday I tilted my head to read a label on the back of a sculpture and carried on going down to the floor.

This morning I went to see the doctor about it. “Is it the drink?” she asked. She diagnosed it as inner ear problem; there’s some troublesome liquid inside which affects my balance. She prescribed some little tablets which I have to stick between my gum and lip and let dissolve. They’re called BUCCASTEM 3MG TABLETS.

Being a careful soul, I read the instructions which came with my anti-giddiness tablets carefully. They tell me:

“Side effects that may occur with Buccastem 3mg tablets are dizziness.”

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